Not A Poltergeist

 

I think my bedroom is haunted. Something sinister lurks in the shadows of the room. In the dark of the night something happens from time to time...OK it happens most nights. It usually happens between 3 and seven and it happens more than one time a night most nights. I will be sleeping peacefully, floating along in my REM bliss and BAM!! It's as if something reaches up from inside me and yanks on my bladder for all it's worth! I believe it is a Pottygeist! A mythological creature who's sense of timing is incredibly annoying and definitely mischievous. 

The Pottygeist has no sense of fairness. It attacks the young and old alike. Usually with the same possibility. A few days ago I was slumbering nicely around 5 a.m. when the Pottygeist grabbed my bladder and squeezed mercilessly! "YIKES!" I exclaimed in my head. I quickly scurried out from beneath the covers and headed for the bathroom, making it by the skin of my teeth. After what seemed like an eternity I returned to the bed. Unfortunately I managed to somehow dislodge the TV remote from the nightstand sending it crashing into a plastic bowl which contained a plastic water bottle. Those two together make a lot of noise in the tranquility of the early morning! The noise woke my wife up. Uhoh... I just simply said, "Oops!" What else could I say? 

I went back to sleep. My wife was now awake and an hour early at that! It's OK...The doghouse is well lit and modestly comfortable.  

Darned Pottygeists!

It's Good To Be The Texan!

 

I am a proud Texan by birth and the grace of God! Being a Texan means something. It means you don't have to endure long extremely cold winters. Ours are usually a month, MAYBE two, long and it begins to warm up to the 50's and 60's and all is right in the world as we know it! I, being a hater of the cold, am particularly happy with this arrangment. Some will argue that the summers in Texas are offsetting to the short, mild winter. I say NAY! I'd much rather have a hundred degree day than a 10 degree day! That is why God created air conditioning! 

Another blessing of being a Texan is the wide open spaces and beautiful country side. I grew up in East Texas where God spends His vacations. The land and people are the best ever there! Pine trees populate the roadside everywhere you look. Awesome. Just awesome. The people are friendly and will help out wherever there is a need! 

No, we don't all have oil wells in our back yards or horses in our pastures. This is just a myth, a rumor started by the uneducated Yankees. You do, however, usually find a dog or two in our yards, maybe a cat for the mice and snakes. But what you WILL find, without doubt, is a sense of neighborliness. 

I love my Texas. I wouldn't live anywhere else. God bless Texas!!

Pepto...This Is How Ya Do It!

 

So...Remember how I told youguys in the last post that the guys and I were meeting for lunch today at the Mexican food restaurant? Well that happened, but this post is about the rest of the story (with apologies to Paul Harvey). I had the fajita beef and chicken nachos. Pop quiz...What always goes with nachos? Yep...jalopenos. I like jalopenos. Lots of them. 

Fast forward to this evening about 7:30. I was visited by the ghost of jalopenos past. Worst case of heartburn I have had in quite awhile! It's now 10 o'clock and it isn't going away. I made a quick trip to the local Dollar General for a bottle of soothing pink liquid fire quincher.  Before I even left the DG parking lot I downed a dose! (No sense waiting around!) It should be noted that I do not take my Pepto in the manner of the average person. I don't fool around with those little plastic cups like they bring you your meds in the hospital in. No sir. I turned that bottle up and swigged my dose that way! 

I first learned this method as a kid when I saw my dad do it like that. I figured that what was good for him would work for me! Unfortunately, here we are three hours later and the molten volcanic lava that is flowing from my throat to my gastric area has not subsided!

Any suggestions would be appreciated. By the way, I have already poured a 20 ounce Dr Pepper over the flames to no avail. To quote that raven in the old Edgar Allen Poe story, "Never more!" Never again will I eat that many peppers! I should have known better! At my age I should have known better! But I love my jalopenos! I guess I also love my pain free nights. Torn between two loves...  What's a man to do?

It's Tuesday!!

 

It's Tuesday! That means one thing...it's the day to meet the guys from church for lunch at 11 o'clock! It started as a simple "Hey lets meet for lunch one day." Now it has evolved into a ritual. Each Tuesday about 6 or 7 of us get together for a meal and some breeze shooting at a designated location.We decide on Sunday morning where the site will be and then spread the word. There is usually no need to worry if someone might not like the kind of food served at the site because we all like ANY kind of food!

Today will be Mexican food! Mariochi's in Greenville, TX. Most weeks we meet at The Rib Crib in Greenville but like to switch it up from time to time. We are on a first name basis with the servers at Rib Crib and they even know our orders when they see us come in the front door. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. Some days we meet at Chili's or a hole-in-the-wall called Glenda's. Glenda's has great home style food at a decent price!

If you are in Greenville sometime on a Tuesday at 11 o'clock, stop by and say howdy or maybe join us!

"Pardon Me Mr President"

In the last few weeks leading up to the final exit of Joe Biden we saw him handing out pardons like candy. It started with his criminal offspring Hunter Biden. After that it was a flurry of pardons and sentence commutations with a spattering of get out of jail free cards mixed in. Today, on the last half day of his Presidency, Joe preemptively pardoned a large group of his family members. Preemptively. That's a nice word for "before they could get arrested for being the crooks they are."

Now the question that looms large over their collective heads is this: If you are not guilty of anything, why do you need a pardon? Let's recall for a second the fact that Sleepy Joe had set up several business accounts in the names of family members. Remember that? Therefore it is no big jump to connect these family members with bribes from foreign countries and other entities made to "The Big Guy". Does the term "money laundering" ring a bell? 

What is Joe and crew afraid of? Why do they need pardons? Keep your eyes open and your ear to the ground folks. We have not heard the end of this stuff.

Good Clean Fun

 Great time tonight on my "date" with my wife! We went to see comedian Jeff Allen at the Greenville Municipal Auditorium. He was funny! Not just funny, but he was "clean"! No curse words needed to deliver a zinger of a punchline. He kept it lively and entertaining the whole hour and a half. I highly recommend seeing him if you get the chance!

Why do today's comedians think they have to curse and be crude in order to be funny? They don't, ya know. Jeff Allen has been doing his shows for years and does not feel the need for profanity or picking the "low hanging fruit" of vulgarity. It was refreshing to listen to a comedian who entertains without offensive language or referrences. Nice job Mr. Allen!

Do The Cowboys Need Deion?

 

So the all powerful Jerry Jones has reached out to "Coach Prime" at Colorado, eh? 

Well as a Cowboys fan since I was 5 I DON'T LIKE THE IDEA! People say, "Look what he has done as a college coach!" OH? What exactly has he done? He never beat a team with a record above 500, He didn't win his bowl game. I mean, really? What has he done? One thing I can tell you he has done is show himself to be what he really is. Disloyal. He has been a coach four years and has been at two different colleges where he promised both teams he would be there for them. He left the first team after the first year when his sons decided to go elsewhere for the money. What about the kids who were there playing for the love of the game? He pretty much said  "you'll get over it" and left.

Then along came the job offer at Colordo. Deion and his sons were out of there like Jed Clampet and the gang! Now JJ has reached out to him about a possible position with my beloved Cowboys. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! He won't stay Jerry! He has ZERO loyalty to anyone but himself! It's all about Deion. Always has been.

I don't know about anyone reading this, but I am 100% against hiring him. I wouldn't put him at assistant coach if it were up to me! We as Cowboys fans have waited for nearly 30 years to get back to the top and we are not even close yet. After the horror film this year was, we know it will be at least one more year for rebuilding. Do not add a year of Deion to that! He will stay one year and then opt out of his contract and go where his son(s) end up. Is that what we want? Is that what we need? No. Hire a real coach Jerry. One that will be loyal.